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5.10 All Alone Nate: "There is no death. Wasn't it a relief when you realized that?" It was fitting that the strangest, most moving, most unconventional funeral of the series was Nate's. Especially the burial, which was actually something like Lisa's. The family lowered Nate into the ground and shoveled the dirt themselves, a contrast to the pilot episode and the dirt shakers. The last shot of the funeral was dirt falling on us. We are Nate. This episode just ripped me to into bitty emotional shreds. It was almost certainly the most I've ever cried for a fictional character. In fact, I was sitting there with tears dripping down my face wondering why I decided to review this fucking series in the first place. David's grief was what moved me the most. He wouldn't let anyone comfort him or help him. He made his lists of tasks and totally focused on them. Jake the evil mugger kept showing up in a red hoodie, obviously a symbol of the terrible grief that David was trying to keep at bay. David shouldn't have gone to pick up Nate's body, but I understand why he did; it was the last thing he could do for his brother. The scene that disturbed me most was David washing Nate's body. It was such a sad, intimate thing to do. David also couldn't stop thinking about the fact that Nate was Ruth's favorite and Claire was Nathaniel's, while he was nobody's. I identified strongly with David. As I've mentioned in my reviews, my sister's unexpected death had a profound effect on me. It took her four days to die. My mother and I leaned on each other and tried to keep each other sane. I've always known that my sister was my mother's favorite. Just after the funeral, when we were at the outer limits of grief-stricken exhaustion, I told her sincerely that I was sorry she'd lost her favorite child and all she had left was me. She was so moved; I could see it on her face. She gave me an odd smile and said she would just have to make do. Maybe that's one reason why this episode hit me so hard. Personal segue over. Claire was a basket case, too, and Ted was my hero again. A desk overflowing with stuff, but no, I'm not busy and I'll be there for you. He made me think that maybe I could marry a Republican, after all. :) Bettina and Sarah stepped in and took wonderful care of Ruth, who tried to assuage her guilt at being unreachable by constantly lashing out at David. (Wow, did that infuriate me.) George was surprisingly wonderful, too. His eulogy was the best of all of them. It was like the old George came back because he knew he was needed. I was pissed at Brenda at first for being so cold and angry and for ultimately dumping Maya on Ruth. But then I really thought about it, and felt a major stab of pity for her. Brenda was in shock, utterly devastated, widowed, pregnant, and with an orphaned little girl to raise. Until Billy showed up at the end, Brenda had no one to lean on. (Margaret was completely self-absorbed by her break-up with Olivier.) Leaving Maya with Ruth was probably the smartest and kindest thing Brenda could have done, for Maya, for Ruth (as a reminder that not all of Nate was gone), and for Brenda herself. More about meaning: -- Maggie came to see Brenda, and accidentally knocked over and broke a plant on the porch. She broke Brenda's husband, too. -- Brenda was the last to leave the funeral, but then she got stuck because her car wouldn't start. Much like her grief. -- The shroud seemed gentler somehow than those cold, hard coffins. It was almost like it was cradling Nate's body. It allowed his family to get closer to him. -- Claire was listening to Kurt Cobain's All Apologies, which was supposed to be his suicide note. -- I liked that Ruth finally acknowledged that she was more like David than any of her other children. And she made certain he attended Nate's burial because she knew he would regret it forever, just like she regretted not being there when Nate died. Bits and pieces: -- No Opening Death. No white title cards. No one died in this one, and David refused to take on a client while Nate's body was in the house. -- Lots of returning characters. Just like a real funeral, when you see a lot of people you haven't seen in awhile. -- I loved the boys bringing David breakfast in bed. -- Rico was all business and practicality and what are we going to do now and we'd better buy life insurance. He was right to be concerned. Nate really was the heart of the business, the one who knew what to say to people who were grieving. Is this the end of Fisher & Diaz? -- Little Maya got real scenes for the first time, even though she was a bit too young to actually do any acting. -- The boys got to see Keith take someone down at Roger's. And then Keith quit because he found out there was a video of his "indecent proposal." I was getting used to seeing Roger sort of positively. Ah, well. -- Everyone was great. Gold acting stars in particular for Michael C. Hall and Lauren Ambrose. Quotes: Brenda: "What is this, some kind of Quaker thing? You fuck someone's husband to death and then you bring them a quiche?" Actually, I'm fairly certain that's not a Quaker thing. :) Ruth: "I don't want another pill. I want my son. I want my beautiful son." Margaret: "Damn, you've had a shitty year." Margaret: "Oh, please. A couple shots of Stoli won't kill the baby. You know, in my day we used to sit on our ass smoking Parliaments for nine months. Today, you have one piece of Brie and everybody goes berserk." Maya: "When is Daddy coming back?" Brenda: "Daddy's dead. Remember, like Nemo's mom? Remember how we talked about that?" Margaret: "You know what, Brenda? I think you should save this discussion for a time when you're less insane with grief." Brenda: "Have you talked with Billy? He's not returning my calls." Margaret: "I suppose he's still in Dubai. Jesus, I hope they haven't taken him hostage. He's not very docile." Ruth: "God is an asshole!" Sarah: "Yes, God is a huge asshole." David: "You could have dressed." Claire: "I couldn't." David: "The rest of us managed." Claire: "Well, the rest of you win." George: "He struggled all through his life to be a good man. He wasn't perfect. But then who among us is? And he never gave up on himself, the people he loved, or even love itself, in all its vexing, beautiful forms." Bettina: "Claire, there's too much cold cuts out there already. Here. Take this scary fruit cake instead." Keith: "Where do we put him?" Rico: "On the ground, I guess." Keith: "Won't he get dirty?" George: "Dust to dust." Sarah: (reading the poem) "The bird of vision is flying toward you with the wings of desire." More birds. Ruth: "I forget how anyone ever gets over anything." This episode was so emotionally draining that Dan refused to ever watch it again. Five out of four stars, Billie View all comments or post a comment. |
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